The Bank of Ferengi

So, my wife’s first husband died seven years ago.

Last year, their banking institution, from here on out referred to as The Bank, sent a check. It was a payout for some type of insurance The Bank had a policy on her former husband. Now, this is a big, national bank, not a little local mom-and-pop kind of bank.

The check is not large but it is enough to help pay a few bills, so its a nice little windfall. The wife took it to The Bank to deposit in her account. The Bank then told her the check was being rejected because it was made out to her dead husband, not her. When she asked if they could cut a new check made out to her, she was told she had to submit paperwork to prove her husband was dead.

Okay.

We worked on gathering all the necessary documentation they requested and submitted it to them. They were supposed to look it over, then cut a new check in 6 – 8 weeks.

We wait, and then get busy dealing with cleaning out the house, and put it out of our minds. Until now.

We called up The Bank to ask about the reissued check. They said they weren’t aware of ay information regarding the check. So, we set an appointment to go in to talk to them about it.

We went in, and spoke with a Bank representative. They called whatever department in The Bank’s network of departments that handled this sort of thing. We explained that we had sent in all the requested paperwork. Then we were told we had to submit another document proving the wife is the beneficiary who is allowed to receive the check. We had to submit a copy of her husband’s will, which stated she is the sole beneficiary and executor of his estate. Apparently that isn’t sufficient. We had to get a court generated certified statement to that effect. We could submit one of two different documents, either would do.

Off to the County Clerk’s Office to get said document. One document they hadn’t even heard of, the other was not applicable to our situation. They did have an affidavit saying the wife was a beneficiary named in her husband’s will. We got a copy of that.

Back to The Bank. Showed them the affidavit. Nope, not good enough.

At this point, we can’t get anything done so we left.

After getting home, we called the lawyer who did probate on her husband’s estate to see if he could figure out what piece of paper The Bank needs. He was out of the office so we hope he will call tomorrow.

It seems to me that we are having to go through a lot of unnecessary hoops. If The Bank hadn’t cut the check to the dead person in the first place, this wouldn’t be a problem. It is their organization, their error, and the money would be put into their institution. Everything is internal to their organization. And why are they even cutting a check? In this day and age, an electronic direct deposit would be much more efficient. It’s like dealing with Ferengi and The First Law of Acquisition – “Once you have their money, never give it back.” Or in this case, “We already have the money so we won’t give it to them in the first place.”

Here’s hoping this mess gets sorted out soon, and ends in a favorable resolution for us.

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