Major Tom enters the house through the back door.
“Everything secure around the perimeter?” I ask.
“All secure,” he replies.
“Good. I appreciate the way you do these random sweeps during the day.”
“Just doing my job.”
“And you do it very well.”
“It’s important to keep you and the Alpha Female safe. I’ve been reviewing the security precautions and I believe we have a hole in our defenses.”
“Oh? I think we’ve covered just about everything. Home invasions, alien invasions, fire, medical emergency, zombpocalypse, vampires, werewolves, spirits, poltergeists, various combinations of all of the above. What are we missing?”
“Something big. Really big.” He pauses. “Kaiju.”
“Damn! You’re right. That is both a big omission and a big subject. It wouldn’t do to have a towering monstrosity come around, stomping the house flat as a pancake. What do you propose?”
“I want to requisition a Mecha and construction of an underground bunker to house it and the necessary lab and techs to keep it operating.”
“Hmmm. That may be a little outside the budget at this point.”
“How can you put a price on safety?”
“That’s the way of the world. Everything comes down to funding. You can have anything you want in this world, but you can’t have everything you want.”
“Okay, how about one of those Boston Dynamics humanoid robots?”
“I don’t think so.”
“What about a Roomba?”
“I’ll think about it. In the meantime, keep working up those plans for the Kaiju Defense System, get me a budget and I’ll see what I can do on my end.”
“You got it. I’ll have it on your desk by oh nine hundred tomorrow morning.”
“I’m looking forward to it.”
Major Tom trots of to work on his plan.
I can’t say as he is wrong, though. We need to add Kaiju Defense to the home defense plan.
I hope the Kaiju in your neck of the woods are behaving themselves, my Hordeling.
If you’d like to support my efforts, why not buy me a chocolate chip cookie through my Ko-Fi page? https://ko-fi.com/jhusum