We were going though the wife’s clothes so we could get them hung up. Most of them were normal things – T-shirts, dresses, jeans, shorts. Things like that.
Then she starts handing me odd things. She hands me this thing that looks like a skirt, but has something like pants legs in it. Also, there is a fake flap sort of thing that goes across the front and looks like it is tied in a knot. She handed it to me balled up and asked me to fold it. I start trying to unfold it so I could orient the garment so I could fold it.
“What is this?” I ask.
“They’re culottes.”
“What’s a culotte?”
“They’re a kind of split skirt.”
I’m good at spatial reasoning but this thing perplexes me. I think it is the fake flap that is throwing me off. After a few more twists and turns I finally get what I think is the top edge and shake it out. Turns out I’m right and everything just sort of falls in place. I get it folded and put away.
After a few more items, she handed me another thing to put on a hanger. It looks mostly like a bathing suit but the straps that would go over the shoulders are crossed. OK, shouldn’t be a problem putting it on a hanger. Wrong! No matter what I did I couldn’t get the stupid thing to stay on the hanger. I tried moving the right straps over the hook and the left straps over the hook, so each side is supported by the opposite side of the hanger. It sort of worked but hung in a very weird manner which disturbed my sense of aesthetics.
Finally she hands me a top that had this bundle of straps coming of his central piece of material. It took me a bit to figure out that the piece of fabric was the back part of the piece of clothing. I tried slipping it over a hanger but again the darned thing wouldn’t go on properly. There seemingly wasn’t a neck hole you’d put your head through. After several attempts I bundled the offending garment into a ball and threw it on the bed, admitting defeat.
She took it and slipped it on a hanger.
I bit back on the resentment rising in my soul. Guys have normal clothes – pants go over the feet and get pulled up. Shirts go over the head, or around the shoulders, the arms go through the openings, you’re done.
How he hell do women get dressed with all these straps and thins all over the clothing? I guess I’ll have to be content with not knowing he answer to that mystery.
“Okay, I’m done. Let’s move on to something else. Like unboxing all the books and putting them on the shelves.”
The wife agreed we were moving on, but she picked putting things away in the kitchen instead. < heavy sigh >
Well, at least we can eat.
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