The weather continues to be nasty, but today the winds died down. Still, it is sub-freezing temperatures and ice covers our yard and driveway.
It occurred to me that there had to be some way to get rid of the ice other than throwing tons of salt on it. I figured a sledgehammer, a pickax, or a flamethrower would be the best options. A flamethrower might be impractical but it would also most likely be the most fun.
Having none of the above I kept pondering. We have a snow shovel but that isn’t really the right tool for the job. I braved the three foot patch of ice between the house and the garage and went in search of a regular shovel, or possibly a sledgehammer. Finding neither one I had to find another alternative.
Ultimately, the only tool I had available to me was a good old-fashioned claw hammer. It wasn’t the most efficient tool but it worked.
I grabbed my trusty hammer and the snow shovel and ventured outside. I will neither confirm or deny that thoughts of Thor preparing to do battle, wielding his mighty hammer Mjolnir, ran through my head at that point.
Why did I do such an insane thing? Several reasons. The wife missed several medical appointments because we couldn’t get her out of the house, or the car out of the driveway to get her to them. We can’t get out of the house in case of emergency. The ice caused me to slip and fall (twice!) when I went to put a letter in the mailbox the other day. But most importantly, I didn’t want the ice to win. (I know, the ice can’t “win” but it felt like a challenge to me so I decided to take it up.)
I worked on the porch steps first. Each step had a big, rounded mound of ice on it, which made it very difficult to get up and down them. I would have thought they’d be flatter as the step surface is flat. The hammer smashed each one until the ice broke up, then the pieces got swept off the steps.
Then I started working on the concrete between the house and the garage. The ice here measured four inches (10 cm) thick and was a pain to try to get to break with the hammer. Eventually I managed to clear enough that a decent sized path lead to the cars.
I got to the grass and gravel parts of the driveway. The ice wasn’t as thick and cracked more easily. Even better, it would splinter into several large pieces. They didn’t always fit well on the snow shovel to be cast aside but less pieces made it easier to dispose of them.
I worked for a few hours this way, smashing the ice with the hammer, then scooping up the pieces and tossing them to the side out of the way. The wife called me at one point and suggested I take a break. I told her no, I was having fun. And I was. There is a slight downward slope to our driveway and when I’d toss the ice pieces to the side, they’d slide down the driveway. Part of our property has a steep drop-off so I’d see if I could get the ice pieces to slide all the way to the drop-off and go over. Most of them were stopped by the row of bushes lined up as a dividing line before the drop-off but a few went over. In retrospect, I should have kept score.
I made a path to the car as well as going around all sides. I was exhausted at that point and came inside to rest. I tried a short fifteen minute nap but the dogs demanded attention. The wife shooed them out but the nap was not refreshing.
I went out for another round. This time I cleared about half the length of the driveway leading to the road going down our hill. Once again I was exhausted and had to stop. That, and the sun was going down. I smashed a few more pieces of ice before going inside, just to show it who was boss.
Tomorrow I think I’ll try to finish clearing the driveway. It may be a fool’s errand because snow is forecast for tomorrow afternoon. Yes, it will cover up everything I’ve done so far. But if it is just snow, that can be shoveled easily. Ice can’t be shoveled without breaking it up first. And if I can get the driveway cleared, I might be ale to make a quick run to the grocery store to get a few extra supplies.
Here’s hoping you aren’t having to clear ice out of your area, my Hordeling.
If you’d like to support my efforts, why not buy me a chocolate chip cookie through my Ko-Fi page? https://ko-fi.com/jhusum